Fame is cheap nowadays. All you need is money, looks, a video camera and the unfortunate uploading of a sex tape in order to cement your place amongst the ‘talent’ of Hollywood. As if any proof were needed, Kim Kardashian is it.
The intellectually stunted businesswoman and celebutante shot to fame in 2007 after a video of her enjoying a spot of coitus with boyfriend-at-the-time Ray J was leaked onto the net. But of course we all know this.
And so does Kim. Never one to pass up an opportunity to remind us that she exists, the sexy socialite has been papped ever since in a variety of excellent fancy dress costumes on her way to A-list parties. Here, we examine the ten best
10. Sailor
Naval warfare never looked so attractive, right? No wonder they say the Navy is effeminate… Here Kim is treating us to her finest impression of a sailor, and boy, oh boy it is fine indeed. Never since Popeye have we so admired someone dressed in a little white hat. Kim donned this little number as part of a special burlesque show in Caesars Palace, Vegas. Oh, to have been in attendance…
9. Princess Jasmine
Remember when you were a kid and the toss up for hottest Disney babe was between Ariel from The Little Mermaid and Belle from The Beauty and the Beast? Then along came Aladdin to blow them both outta the water. The scantily clad Princess Jasmine had us all wondering what lay underneath the baggy pants, and thanks to Kim’s leaked sex tape, now we know! This spicy outfit was part of Ms Kardashian’s 2009 Halloween celebrations, and, interestingly, the sultry sexpot uses the the Aladdin character’s name when checking into hotels, apparently.
8. Snow White
Here’s Kim hanging around dressed as yet another Disney hottie who had us all wondering what that funny feeling was when we watched her prance about as kids. In this case it’s Snow White, whose colorful garb she slipped into for the 14th birthday party of fellow Keeping Up with the Kardashians star Kendall Jenner in 2009. It’s all well and good for Kim to be dressing up as the heroine so beloved by the seven dwarfs, but the question on everyone’s lips is – who was dressed as that other fairytale staple, the ugly witch? Her hideous sister Khloe, no doubt…
7. Leopard
Although this outfit is a little less revealing than we’d like, it’s undeniable that good ol’ Kim would still turn heads cavorting around Hollywood parties dressed like a sexy leopard. In actual fact though, this cat suit is one that she eschewed in favor of another Halloween costume. Shame, really, as one thing’s for sure: if you encountered her on a safari it wouldn’t be your rifle you were aiming her way. Kim Purrrdashian, indeed.
6. Wonder Woman
There was never any reason to dispute – nor try to better – the impeccable funbags of original Wonder Woman star Lynda Carter… Still, Kim decided to give it her best shot in 2008 while hosting a Halloween party in Beverly Hills back in 2008. And who are we to judge? Surely the more hot babes trying to squeeze themselves into tightly corseted blue and red superhero outfits with thigh-high boots the better… right?
5. Buxom Beer Wench
No look on a woman is better than that of the breast-heavy beer wench. It combines man’s two favorite things – beer and boobs – in a match made in sheer heaven. So what a delight it is to see Kim achieve the pinnacle of this heady combo with her delightfully revealing Oktoberfest outfit, which she sported while on a European promotional tour in 2010. Not since Heidi Klum has something German given us such a feeling of sexual gratification – or made us want to crack open a Pilsner – as strongly as this perfect image.
4. Flapper
The Twenties has had something of a revival in recent times, with everyone from Christian Aguilera to Nelly donning the drapes and going it Prohibition-style for entertainment’s sake, so it’s no surprise that at some point in her busy and profound schedule Kim found the time to construct this little ensemble for one of the modest parties she regularly attends – in this case the Pur Jeans Halloween party, which she attended with then boyfriend Reggie Bush back in 2008. There she rocked a flapper’s dress complete with sexy pearls and a cigarette holder, though we can’t help but wish it were something else she was smoking…
3. Queen of Hearts
What is it with hot girls and Disney characters? Walt must have had a filthy imagination, ’cause just about every fairytale woman incarnated in his movies seems to have been given the Midas touch by generations of girls competing for the prize of sluttiest Halloween costume possible. Kim wins, in our opinion, with this ultra-sexy impersonation of the Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland. Can you believe this outfit was a 2010 Halloween reject? What’s not to like about those legs?
2. Pirate
Spending 19 weeks at sea with weevil-ridden biscuits and a bad case of scurvy would be totally worth it just to spend ten minutes up in the crow’s nest with this sultry Cap’n. Screaming school girls have Jack Sparrow; red-blooded males have Kim, dressed to impress on the high seas. This sure is some bountiful booty! Unbelievably, it’s another costume Kim thought it best to leave in the chest for Halloween last year.
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